My brain hurts.

Right now K Bargie is reading me part of a report he is writing at the moment.  He is doing a PhD in something I don't understand.  Of the two sentences he just read out to me, I can repeat none of it as that is how much of it my brain actually processed.  Oh hell.

In other news, it's taken me a while to report this, but I finally have the chance to do so.  The following books have been released over the past two months by Static Movement and feature some of my stories:

Ruby Red Cravings, edited by the awesome Brianna Stoddard, is now available to purchase and has two stories from my "Flashes Before her Eyes" vampire series.  "Northern Winds" (Viking vampires-say what?!) and "Last of the Wilds" which involves my vampire having an erotic encounter with a lesbian tree.  Oh yes, you read that right!

Two Naomi Clark anthologies, the first being Serve in Heaven, Reign in Hell, an anthology of angels and demons.  Here you can find my flash piece "Strings" about angelic puppets.  I really like this wee piece.  I wrote it while skulking in one of the galleries at work one Saturday afternoon.  Might add it into "Simple Twists of Fate".

Wicked Witchery is a very recent release.  It's available on the Pill Hill Shoppe at the moment and should be up for sale on Amazon very soon.  It's got a page on Amazon just no purchase info as of yet.  This book contains "Second Hand Faith" which is a daft wee prequel to the fantasy novel I've been working on since the day I turned 16 (shit you not).  I love these characters and it'll be brilliant to see them in print.

As K Bargie has stopped talking about transnationalism and cultural identity (far too heavy for discussion on such a sunny day) I am going to leave you all now with a final thought.  Adam (of Ferocious Bloodaxe fame) who did the awesome posters for The Shadow People has begun work on a cover for Simple Twists of Fate.  Can't wait to see it!!!!!

Here comes the sun, do-doop-do-doo.

Lotsaluv, Em

Of Stepford Wives and Strange Devices

Beautiful day.  Sitting in the kitchen typing this as the sun streams in through the French doors.  Unfortunately, they are firmly shut and locked as the dog is being a little shit and keeps barking at the kids playing in the lane beside my garden.  Shall attempt to ignore him but he's a bloody pest.

Typing up the last story for "Simple Twists of Fate" right now.  Then it's on to the final edit.  Really excited.  Tomorrow is going to be a total work-a-thon and I'm just going to blitz this book.  All of the stories need a read-through and tidy up but "Swampblood" needs a lot of work.  I suspect that is what'll eat up most of my attention and time.  Not long now though.  Want to have my sample stories ready to go by the end of the week so fingers crossed.

In other news, K Bargie and I got our wee flat :)  Sooooooooo happy!  Not sure quite when we move in yet but I'll keep you posted.  The down side to this is that I'll be without internet access for a while so blog posts may be few and far between throughout August.  However, a couple of my fave pubs do free wifi so I may just drag my laptop into either of those.

While I type this I can hear K upstairs, faffing about with my guitar.  He's in the process of teaching himself "Let her Dance", which is the closing track of "Fantastic Mr Fox" - a film he loves to a stupid degree.  I'm going to attempt to make a pecan pie for him today.  What has become of me?  Moving in with a man-creature and baking him pies?!  What would the Pankhursts say?

Anyway, I better get back to this story.  And apologies to Paul and Andy, whom I left a very daft post about on Thursday night.  If you didn't see it guys, it was just very dopey - praising Paul's blog and describing Andy reading a Charlotte Roche book to my dog.  Cocktails and the internet DO NOT mix well!  Swiftly deleted this.  Hope you both don't mind!

Got to go now and enjoy the rest of this bright Sunday.  Have a good one, bunnies!

Lotsaluv, Em

Erotic Topic Part 2

Some exciting news...

First of all, K Bargie and I got another step closer to the dream home.

Second, my story "Salt Skin" (title taken from the Ellie Goulding song) has been accepted by the wonderful Brianna Stoddard to appear in "Satin Beauty". This is an erotica anthology she's editing for Static Movement and I can't wait to get my hands on this book! Oooh-er!

Kinky!

Lotsaluv, Em

Eeeep!

K Bargie and I may have found our dream home.  I am so excited.  K keeps reprimanding me for lurking on furniture websites.  Apparently I am not allowed a table which pulls out like slices of pizza (from Next.co.uk)

Damn him.  Scouting out Batman prints and posters already. Skweeeeee!  Fingers crossed.  It's even going to have a little office/library to write in.  Woohoo!!!  More news to come...

I am aware that this is supposed to be a blog about my writing and I have descended into some Stepford Wife-type creature but screw you, I'm happy.  Writing tonight, I promise...

Lotsaluv, Em

Busy week!

No time for anything this week. K Bargie and I are flat-hunting at the moment so we've been rushing around the city like mad folk. On top of that we've got a birthday and a wedding this week AND I quit my job on Sunday.

I don't know when my brain will stop spinning.

In good news...Adam has agreed to do the cover for Simple Twists of Fate. Yaaaaaaay!

Lotsaluv, Em

Captain Hook

Typed up a big chunk of SToF and taught myself to crochet (with Mum's help). Apparently I sound like Herman Munster when I make a mistake. Ah well I do like the Munsters...

2 stories left to type up and then it's on to the editing, rewriting and re-editing stage. Awesomeness.

Remember to check out the free story for July!!!

Night night bunnies. Sweet dreams and dreadful nightmares.

Lotsaluv, Em

Real Work

Typing tonight.  Like a crazed looney tune.  Making up for a week's laziness.  I've made a deal with myself: if I get 3 stories typed up tonight then I can learn how to crochet.  I bought a book on Amigurumi last week and it's sitting in my room winking at me, trying to seduce me into skiving off and just making cootchy little creatures all night instead.  So instead, I will type up a handful of stories and then I can crochet to my wee heart's content.

Story that I've got sitting in a Word document under this page right now is a children's story called "Puddles", based on the Jasmine Becket-Griffith painting "Autumn Mermaid":

Image copyright Jasmine Becket-Griffith and taken from Jasmine's own site.  Really pleased with this story.  It's ridiculously cute.  Anyway, I'm a little chunk through it and here's a little taster for you:

As he turned to go back to the house, Jamie heard a splash, coming from one of the puddles.  An unchecked puddle, actually.  He looked over in the direction of the noise.  In his cold grip, the bucket was feeling much heavier now that it was full of water.  He really should be heading home now.  The puddle splashed again.  He had seen it this time, he definitely had.  Bucket down, wellies shlooped through the mud towards this uncharted puddle.  It wouldn’t hurt to investigate.  Would it?  He crossed the short distance to the puddle, stationed himself right over it and took a good look down...

Hope you like so far!!  This is no where near as dark as I usually go but it's sweet and mermaid-a-licious!

I've also put up July's free story - "A Pirate's Life for Me" - which originally appeared in Ethereal Tales (which is sadly coming to a close) and is part of my Vampire series: "Flashes Before her Eyes".  Enjoy!

Better go get typing now!  Nearly there!!!!

Lotsaluv, Em

Currently Listening to: Strange Boy by Kerli
Current Simple Twists of Fate word count: 60,262 words

Lazy

I wrote nothing yesterday. Instead I spent the day in my pyjammies watching nonsense films. What is wrong with me?!

Lotsaluv, Em

Lazy

Damn right...

I am going to write all day tomorrow. I swear to the Gods. K Bargie is faffing about with movie soundtracks right now so I don't care. It sounds like Ghostbusters 2. All day I'm going to create wonderland. I'm writing something to "Hurt" by Johnny Cash. Gonnae be awesome, I promise. Sort of twisted Rapunzel. Anywho, Kylie's off the computer so I better scoot...

Farewell my loyal bunnies, thank you for visiting.

Lotsaluv, Em

Raven on My Shoulder...

Wow, been a while again.  I'm terrible at keeping up with this.  Apologies.  Anyway, this little post is a major update...

Only 20,000 words away from finishing Simple Twists of Fate.  Woohoo!!!  And to top that off, I've got 3 and a half stories sitting in front of me right now, lurking in notepads, waiting to be typed up. (3 and a half because I didn't get a chance to finish the 4th one in work today.)  Pretty pleased with these ones and they fit in with the rest of the collection well.

On the whole, the book is shaping up brilliantly.  Really really pleased with it.  However, during the week there I removed an erotica piece called "Salt Skin", which just didn't really feel right with the other stories.  Anyway, it's a mermaid tail and I've already got 3 mermaid pieces in the book and I don't want it to drown it with siren stories (har har sea humour).  Although, Brianna Stoddard is running an erotica book over at Static Movement so I may send it swimming her way and see if she bites (okay, I'm through with the puns now I promise).

Have noticed that quite a few of my newer pieces have been in the same vein as my story "Moth Touch", which was published in Creepy Things: An Anthology of the Creepy-Crawly, Spooky & Silly, published by Static Movement.  By that I mean mini character portraits capturing one scene, a la the prologues in The Canterbury Tales (which I was obsessed with when I was about 17).  Pretty happy with this as it keeps in tone with my "Simple Twist of Fate" theme.

This collection will also include my brand new novella, "Swampblood", which I originally wrote as a short story for a different collection.  However, even when I finished the original short story, I new there was much more to this tale and decided straight away that it would be much better suited as a novella.  It tells the tale of the sheriff of the small Louisiana town of Swampblood and his search for his girlfriend, a newcomer to the town.  So excited about this piece.  It's one of my favourites!

Once I type up these stories tonight, I'm spending the next week doing read-throughs, edits and rewrites.  This will ensure that everything is perfect.  Hopefully should have the whole book completed within the next few weeks.  Fingers crossed.

And now for something completely different...  Little plug here for a fellow blogger.  I urge you all to go check out A Cinephile's Journey, which is a freaking awesome blog.  My most cinematically literate and sharply dressed mate Paul Costello has started an epic project.  He is watching every film he owns in alphabetical order and reviewing it.  So far, he's 15 films down and not even out of the As.  This makes my film collection look pitiful.  I think it will even overshadow my film-obsessed partner-in-crime K Bargie's vast DVD horde.  Paul has already covered some awesome films, including Ace Ventura and The Adventures of Prescilla, Queen of the Desert, which is one of my faves.  Prescilla is sheer Aussie genius and Paul's review of it is spot on.  So, fair bunnies, I implore you, join one man on his journey through his DVD shelf ( or shelves more like if his room is anything like K Bargie's).

That seems to be us all caught up now!  I better beat it and finish typing up these stories and get closer to that goal of completing Simple Twists of Fate.  Not long now...

Farewell, bloody bunnies...

Lotsaluv, Em